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2011-02-07 - 1:30 p.m. The worst part is feeling so out-of-control. I want to make it happen. I want it to feel like it used to. I feel so fucking lost and scared right now. Every time I move away or hold back I am filled with guilt. I am hurting you. Knowingly. I am breaking us. We are falling apart. I am here and you are there and we are pretending we are together. I want to rewind everything, or move forward. I can't keep this up. I am so fucking terrified of losing you but i feel like I already have. I don't know what to do. I want 'us' back. I don't want this. |
