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2006-09-22 - 12:08 a.m.
blah blah blah

I miss childhood so much right now.
I feel like all my life consists of at the moment is decisions. BIG decisions. BIG, IMPOSSIBLE decisions. I feel like I have no time (and not enough money) to screw up. I will not be young forever. I just wish I could be happy with the moment, instead of always dreaming about the future, and how I will make it work. It is not that I am suicidal, or in a completely depressed, self pitying state- this is a different feeling. I feel as upset as I was in junior high and parts of highschool, but this time with perspective. I know things will eventually work themselves out- I just wish I could find that puzzle piece that could do it. It is so frustrating not having a clue what to do! I've looked forward to University since I was in elementary school, I really WANT to enjoy this experience...I just don't want to make a huge mistake.
Fuck.

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